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Another year over already? Scratch that… another decade. It’s scary when I remember the entire decade– like what I did on New Year’s Eve for the last 10 years. Actually that’s an easy one. I have spent every New Years except one (1993) with my brother. Depending on our age we would either tear up every bit of paper in the house and use it for confetti when Dick Clark tells us the ball as dropped (and then get grounded for the first 2 weeks of the new year by our mother because we used bills/insurance forms/mortgage payments as confetti. Who knew? Paper is paper when you’re 8 years old.) Or we go to a hockey game and return to Brother’s house for a party and fireworks. Good times.

I love my holiday vacation and not just because I’m a big old holiday nerd. Being in Upstate NY feels like Christmas– even in the summer. Maybe it’s because I’m only there on vacation, I eat my face off, and I always return with lots of presents? This year was no exception. I think about New Year’s Resolutions every year and usually decide they’re a waste of time. If something is important enough to change/add/fix then I would have done it sooner, right? And then I usually feel guilty and make one up that I don’t care if I break. That one is usually “wear lipstick.”

Do you buy apples every time you’re at the grocery store only to watch them rot in your crisper drawer? Maybe you don’t really like the taste of apples so much as the act of buying them. I mean, they look so good on display in your local grocer’s produce department. And other people look fresh and happy eating them. So you buy them with the best intentions and lay them to rest lovingly in your nice, clean crisper drawer. Tomorrow you will eat an apple. And it will be fabulous. Only tomorrow comes and you forget about the apples. And the next day. And the next. And when you remember it’s too late. AGAIN! The apples are mush in your crisper drawer. And that’s why your crisper drawer is so darn clean! You’re constantly cleaning apple guts out of it! Does this happen to you? Does it?!

Well it happens to me, only not with apples. I buy lipstick with a fervent passion. I love lipstick. I love trying on lipstick. I love picking out lipstick. I love holding the little tubes of promise in my fingers, thinking this one will be different–I just know it. I love tucking it away in my make-up bag and never seeing it again. Why, lipstick, why?!

So every year I promise to give those unused lipsticks a try. I leave them on my kitchen counter, by the bathroom sink, next to my water bottle at work. And yet, nothing. My lips remain their natural color, coated in lip balm. Oh yeah, did I mention my OCD habit of wearing lip balm? Oh yes, I’m constantly slathering that stuff on. And yes, before you ask, I have tried the tinted lip balms. Still no love.

This year in addition to the whole doomed-to-fail-lipstick thing I’m also going to resolve to do something equally crazy. I resolve to update this website every week. I know! Now let’s not get crazy here! By “update” I mean maybe a little note that says “Hi! Just wanted to let you know I was thinking of you!” But that counts, right? I talk, er…rant… constantly, believe me. It shouldn’t be too hard to put some of that down on cyber paper, right? We’ll see.

So here we go, 2010! May we always have much to write, talk and laugh about. And maybe have your mouth coated in the lovely shade of “capricious” while doing it. Cheers!

*This post is dedicated to Jim Hopper, who has guilted me into making such a foolish resolution. I know, Jim, I know…

Shelly Mazzanoble

2 Replies to “Happy New Year! And Stuff I promise…”

  1. Wow…I feel all honored n stuff!!!

    Let’s hope you’re not cursing my name when it comes to choosing between updating this blog (and thereby keeping your resolution) or watching some Food Network Challenge that you’ve had dvr’ed for six weeks.

    Good luck! I’ll be reading…

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