Mother Rose Best, Week 9

Remember this girl?

Sit and spin, bitches!
Sit and spin, bitches!

Spoiler alert! She’s still in the running to be America’s Next– oops! Wrong show. But yeah, she’s still in the running to be Bachelor Ben Higgins’ ex-fiance. Which is great because she’s helping today’s children become better citizens of tomorrow. How, you ask? Clearly you have not been reading Mother Rose Best. You best giddy-on-up over to In the Powder Room and check out the latest, Jamaican of a Marriage, right now. Why? Because I’m the mother, that’s why! And clean your room while you’re at it.

 

C-Sections Aren’t So Bad (But Facebook is a Jerk)

Quinn was delivered by C-section. This took everyone except my mom’s psychic by surprise as she predicted it months ago. I was horrified by this turn of events, sure that I was destined for months, maybe years, of recovery. I would never do another sit up, I would never loose the baby weight, I wouldn’t be able to lift my child for two years post-surgery.

Know what? It wasn’t so bad. But it took a little while to come to this conclusion. So I wrote about it, hoping other women who had C-sections and the subsequent guilt that sometimes comes with it, would at least have a laugh. Thank you Blunt Moms for the opportunity!

Sometimes I treat myself to a little Facebook post boosting. I tried to do that with this here article but alas, Facebook declined me. Why, you ask? Good question. Here is the post I tried to PAY THEM TO PROMOTE.

This post has been banned in every, single country.
This post has been banned in every, single country.

Could Facebook be anti-C-section? Did they not like the photo? Could they possibly have an issue with the word vagina? Nah! Can’t be. But then I got this email.

facebook
Hi Shelly,
It looks like your ad didn’t meet our Advertising Policies, so it was not approved.
Ad Name: Post: /217175581669779
Ad Creator Name: Shelly Mazzanoble
Here’s why we couldn’t approve this ad
  • Your ad wasn’t approved because it doesn’t follow Facebook’s Advertising Guidelines for language that is profane, vulgar, threatening or generates high negative feedback. Ads can’t use language that insults, harasses or demeans people, or addresses their age, gender, name, race, physical condition or sexual preference.
    Before resubmitting your ad, please visit the Help Center to learn more and see examples of ads that meet our guidelines.
    If you’ve read the guidelines in the Help Center and think your ad follows the rules and should’ve been approved, please let us know.

Umm, yeah, Facebook, I think my ad follows your rules. I read your guidelines and no where does it say I can’t use a proper medical term for a body part. I mean, WTF? Have you seen some of the crap people are posting on your puritanical site? What about starving, abused puppies or images of the recent horrific shootings or Donald Trump? What did I say that was PROFANE, VULGAR, THREATENING OR COULD GENERATE HIGH NEGATIVE FEEDBACK?

I wrote to them to get clarification but haven’t heard back yet. I’ll be sure to let you know. In the meantime, feel free to share the post ON FACEBOOK and see if you can make some Silicon Valley, vagina-phobic intern blush while pushing the “not approved” button. Jerk.

 

I’m Popular

It’s not the year 1980. Not a popular year for me. But who cares because I’m popular now. So to speak.

Out of all the content that exists on this site (and it’s a lot, believe me) and all the fabulous women blogging in this community, to be called out as “Most Popular on BlogHer” is pretty darn cool. It is right? I think it is. So much so that I had to commemorate this moment with a screen shot and share it with you all.

Next up, 7th grade Vice President here I come!
Next up, 7th grade Vice President here I come!

See that in the right hand column? Right underneath Blossom? (Okay, like 3 under Blossom, keep looking.) That’s meeeeeeeeeeee!

 

What’s That Tooting Sound?

Oh, get back here. It’s not what you think.

Why it’s my horn, of course. Why? Because it’s been a while since I tooted it, right? Well, as least that you know. (My husband might have a different story.)

I do not know the Cunning Geek, but I do believe he is the Cat’s Pajamas, as his WordPress proclaims. And really it has nothing to do with the fact that he gave Confessions of a Part-Time Sorceress a glowing review. Honest. I swear.

Dice Monkey Interview

Monkey’s are just plain funny. I can’t help but see them in those Career Builder commercials and just laugh my face off. I know their not supposed to make me want to work with monkeys because they’re acting like such pains in the ass but I don’t care. Monkeys are funny. Especially monkeys in business shirts and ties.

But I digress.

We’re not talking about career sabotaging monkeys. We’re talking Dice Monkeys (also funny), or more specifically the blog about D&D. I had the pleasure of chatting with them for a second time. Even before our first chat I loved them. Maybe it’s a monkey thing? But certainly after our second conversation, I’m even more enamored. They just seem like such nice people.

Please check out our conversation here.

Where Did All This News Come From?

Holy cats! There’s all sorts of things I need to update you about. I should warn you– they’re mostly about me so if that doesn’t interest you than…well…  you’re kind of at the wrong place.

Here’s an interview I did with The Married Gamers.

And there’s this book review from 2 GMs, 1 Mic. I totally agree with this statement:

Sometimes it does seem that her writing rambles along or goes too long to make a point. I did find myself lost a couple of times in the middle of a three sentence paragraph because the topic had shifted drastically and I was lost.

Yes, dear reader, I feel your pain. It feels that way to me too sometimes.  It’s also very common in face to face conversations. Now let’s take a moment and pour one out for my poor editors and copy editors.

Judy really wants me to share this review from Roleplayers Chronicle with you because she gets a pretty good review too. She’s often woefully misunderstood and blames me for that. Tell me, if someone says a whole bunch of stuff and someone else goes and writes that stuff down, and the person who said all that stuff kind of comes across as overbearing, meddlesome, and pushy, who’s fault is it? The sayer or the writer?

And you probably already heard the news about D&D, right? If not, here’s a couple of articles to get you caught up:

Forbes.com

NYTimes.com

Are you guys excited about this? Do you care? Do you need to talk? I’m here for you. Personally I’m very excited. Wizards has never involved the community to such an extent and I can’t wait to see how that shapes the future of D&D.

Someone on Facebook just pointed out that whenever I publish a new book, a new edition is announced. Hmm… We’re two for two. I might have to publish another book just to see what happens.

 

Wiredcom Interview

You’re probably familiar with Ethan Gilsdorf, author of the wonderfully geeky memoir Fantasy Freaks and Gaming Geeks. He’s also a freelancer writer, (because he’s cool like that and can live the dream) for such outlets as The Boston Globe and Wired.com’s Geek Dad column. Lucky duck.

And speaking of lucky ducks– I had the pleasure of being interviewed by him! Even luckier– he loved Judy! Phew! I thought I was going to have to write a third book just to repair her reputation.

You can read the interview here.

Enjoy!

Omnivoracious: Tips from the Pros (a.k.a. Me)

Yes, me.

The lovely Susan Morris called me a pro! Isn’t that special? I think so.

In case you didn’t know, I write a monthly column for Dragon. Been writing it for about 4 years and some change. You’d think by now the monthly deadline wouldn’t sneak up on me but alas… it does. Every month.

I turned November’s column in today (yeah– go me!), which is not exactly a coup considering November is almost over. In case you have ever wondered how these columns are born, you can now read all about my writing process. (Hint: Zelda does not write them. I wish. I really, really wish.)

Check out my Omnivoracious post here.

Suvudu Interview

So today I was at work and emailing the fine people at Suvudu about some D&D work stuff and Matt Staggs, (one of Suvudu’s fine bloggers) who happened to be on the email thread asked if I would answer a few questions about my book. Well of course, I said! I always have time for a few questions about my book! So he emails me some questions and I answer them and like 6 minutes later the interview was posted. Seriously. Got to love technology.

It’s probably old news now but if you’d like to read the interview, you can find it here.

Enjoy!